Overcoming Unforgiveness

Last week our Pastor gave a really good sermon on unforgiveness and what it does to the person holding onto it, and there was some very interesting points I thought would be great to share here. I didn’t take notes, so forgive me if I don’t get all the exactly the way he laid them out, but I will do my best.

This message was part of his sermon series called “Junk in your Trunk” and unforgiveness is certainly junk in your trunk. When you hold onto unforgiveness, the only person you’re hurting is yourself. God’s word says in Matt. 5:23 to reconcile any differences with a brother before going to God at the altar. This shows us that we need to take care of any issues we may have with someone, before we go to God.

Illness, disease and pain have often been traced back to unforgiveness against someone. When you hold onto unforgiveness, it eats away at your soul, but does nothing to the person you refuse to forgive. Maybe you have experienced this at one time or another. Perhaps someone did something so horrible to you that you couldn’t forgive them for a long time and every time you thought of that person or thought of what they did to you, you felt hatred or anger boiling up inside you. But, once you decided to forgive them, the bad thoughts and anger went away. Maybe you even had a recurring illness, but since forgiving them, you haven’t experienced that illness. That’s because the unforgiveness was hurting you, not them. Most of the time the person you are not forgiving doesn’t feel a thing or isn’t even aware of how you feel.

There is a spiritual root connected to unforgiveness and illness or disease. If you are holding on to unforgiveness, check your heart, pray about how you can forgive that person, and do it immediately. All it takes is a few simple words. Tell your brother (the other person) that you have certain feelings against them, and you need to ask their forgiveness. However, don’t place blame. This is not the time to rehash the incident or issue that caused the ill feelings. Simply let them know how you were feeling, and now you are forgiving them and asking them to forgive you. You’ll be amazed at the relief you will instantly feel.

If they are not accepting of your forgiveness, that is on their shoulders. You were obedient to God’s Word and now you can move on.

If the person you need to forgive is not around to speak to in person, simply forgive them in your heart. You can say a prayer to God, or simply say it in your head from your heart. Even if they have passed away, if you are still holding onto unforgiveness, forgiving them can be done.