Clothes and Kids

Recently Monday nights have been established as sewing night.  Why?  Well, because I need summer clothes!  Mine are pretty worn out at this point – not to mention the fact that our circumstances have changed such that I really need some different types of clothing in my wardrobe.

My husband and I had set aside some tax refund money to go buy new clothes for both of us.  Then we took our kids to their regularly scheduled dentist appointments – and learned that our clothing money (plus a good bit more) would instead be flowing directly into our middle child’s mouth.  Such is life!

God was a step ahead of me, though.  Several months ago my mother-in-law decided that she probably wouldn’t be doing much sewing any more.  Years ago she had given me one of her awesome old sewing machines, and I have used it faithfully.  So, she knew exactly what needed to be done with the rest of her sewing supplies.  They were boxed up, bagged up, packaged up and given to me!  Boxes and bags of material, notions, patterns, and supplies.  Paired with some of the patterns I’d found over the years on those lovely 99 cent sales days, I had a wide range of clothing options available.  So, Monday was set as sewing night and I began replenishing my wardrobe.

The results so far have been wonderful!  Two skirts and two tops have been completed, with a pair of gauchos cut out and ready to sew and three more tops waiting to be cut out and made.  I’ve been thrilled!

The results have also been very interesting.  You see, both skirts have been made from the same pattern but different material.  Both tops have been made from the same pattern but different material.  And, each project has shown very unique results.

The first skirt was very casual – adequate for a Sunday morning with the right top, but just as perfect as a cool every-day summer skirt.  The second skirt was just the opposite.  Elegant and dressy – it ended up being my Easter skirt.  It would not be good for every-day wear.  The same thing happened with the blouses.  One can be every-day casual with the casual skirt or even look great with jeans or khakis.  It can also look nice with the dressy skirt for a Sunday morning.  The other blouse, though, wouldn’t look right with jeans.  It would dress up khakis, but look best with the dressy skirt.

So, what does all of this have to do with parenting?

Our children are very similar to these outfits.  They are similar in that they are children raised by the same parents in the same home with the same genes.  Beyond that, they are very different.

Just as the same style of sewing can result in very different clothing based on the material used, so the same style of parenting can result in very different children depending on their personalities.  And, there are times when the “pattern” used for one type of material or personality will just not work on another no matter how hard we try!

It’s often a struggle as parents to make the adjustment in our parenting styles when our children have such varied personalities.  We think we have one pattern figured out and then along comes a child who totally breaks that particular mold.

The beautiful and amazing thing about it all is that we have a guide.  When I sew, the pattern creators have listed what materials are best for the pattern.  Guidelines are included to show how to make adjustments for materials with a nap or pattern.  I don’t have to stumble through it blindly, wondering why my material just isn’t working for the pattern.

In the same way, God doesn’t insist that we go through parenthood blindly.  He is the Creator of our wonderful children, and He knows exactly how they need to be raised and grown!  He knows what they need to be just who He created them to be.  Sometimes that means we have to adjust our parenting pattern and maybe even let go of some of the goals and dreams we have for our precious little ones.  Sometimes that means we have to release our hard and fast parenting methods.  But it always means we never have to walk it alone.  The Creator has promised wisdom – and gives it freely (James 1:5).

I’ve enjoyed seeing the result of my Monday night work.  But, I must say that seeing the results of the work I put into parenting is phenomenally more rewarding.  That’s a project with eternal significance, and I pray that I will diligently grow in my efforts to follow the pattern set before me by their Creator – the pattern that will lead to absolutely phenomenal results.